754.1863.Let Us play Yesterday

754.1863.Let Us play Yesterday

Before leaping into my interpretation of this poem, here is Preest’s (2014) comment:

“In her second letter to Thomas Higginson (L261), written in April 1862, Emily had said, ‘For several years, my Lexicon – was my only companion.’

“Like poem 299 [F418] this poem describes how the arrival of Sue awoke Emily to a new life and to riches she had not known before. Emily says to Sue in effect:

“Let’s imagine the time before your arrival when ‘You _ and Eternity’ were not part of my life. I did feel a hunger and thirst for something different, and tried to appease them by studying language and numbers. But in my dreams I would see the colours of morning, the reds of sexuality. I was still imprisoned in my egg, but you came and broke (= troubled) the ellipse of my shell, and I, a fledgling Bird, fell out from it. (Lines 1–16)

“I forgot my manacles, as the newly freed always do. Liberty, my last thought at night and my first at waking, would never be as common as it was to me then. (Lines 17–24)

“And now? I cannot return to my previous Bonds, any more than the Lark can ‘resume the Shell’ once it has known the easier freedom of the sky. Now that I have tasted the freedom of your love, my prison would ‘sorer grate’ if I was doomed anew to it. I can only pray to the God of everything not to take my liberty from me. (Lines 25–36)”.  (Preest 2014)

ED and Sue attended Amherst Academy together during academic year 1846–1847, when they were 15/16 years old. This poem seems to tell their story from ED’s viewpoint. Below (left) are ED’s stanzas and (right) my interpretation

Let Us play Yesterday . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Let us play as we did Yesterday
I – the Girl at School – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .When I was just a girl at school
You – and Eternity – the untold Tale – . . You – and Love – / The untold Tale

Easing my famine . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .You eased my famine for love
At my Lexicon – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .I majored in English
Logarithm – had I – for Drink – . . . . . . . . .Math – had I – for Drink
‘Twas a dry Wine – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .’Twas a dry Wine –

Somewhat different–must be– . . Something different must have happened
Dreams tint the Sleep – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Dreams filled my Sleep,
Cunning Reds of Morning . . . . . . . . . . . . .Cunning Reds of Morning
Make the Blind – leap – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .I made the Blind leap into love

Still at the Egg–life – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .I was still in the egg stage
Chafing the Shell – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .But chafing at my shell
When you troubled the Ellipse–. . . . . . . . When you opened my Ellipse
And the Bird fell –. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I fell in love with you –

Manacles be dim – they say –. . . . . .. . My memory of loneliness grew dim,
To the new Free – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .I felt newly free
Liberty – commoner – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .This new liberty could
Never could – to me –. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Never feel Common to me.

‘Twas my last gratitude. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . It was my last prayer of thanks
When I slept – at night – . . . . . . . . . . . . . .When I went to sleep at night
‘Twas the first Miracle. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .It was my morning Miracle
Let in – with Light –. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Flooding me with Light –

Can the Lark resume the Shell – . . . . . . . Can a lover resume loneliness
Easier – for the Sky –. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . That would be easier for the sky
Wouldn’t Bonds hurt more. . . . . . . . . . . . Wouldn’t loss of love hurt more
Than Yesterday? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Than not knowing it at all?

Wouldn’t Dungeons sorer grate . . . . . . . Wouldn’t Prison grate more
On the Man – free – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .On a prisoner set free
Just long enough to taste – . . ..  Just long enough to taste the wine of love
Then – doomed new – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Then doomed to eternal loneliness

God of the Manacle . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . God of the unloved
As of the Free – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . And of the Loved
Take not my Liberty . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Take not my Love
Away from Me – . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Away from Me

PS. ED’s handwritten manuscript format for Stanza 1 is a quatrain:

Let Us play Yesterday
I – the Girl at School –
You – and Eternity – the
untold Tale –

but ED’s capitalization indicates a tercet, which her editors have published (above left column). Did ED intend a quatrain?:

Let Us play Yesterday
I – the Girl at School –
You – and Eternity –
The untold Tale –

 

For me, Stanza 1 is the prelude to the “Untold Tale”, and Stanzas 2-9 are the “Untold Tale // Easing my famine”.

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